Gravity always wins.

I've noticed, once I get to feeling as up as anyone could feel, I end up hitting reality while I'm so far up, and it brings me back to the lowest low you could ever imagine. Does that make sense to you? because it makes perfect sense to me. I really need to know if what I have been thinking is true. I just don't understand how people live their lives and never EVER get caught up in such a mess like I have been. I don't understand how some people can steal, assault, and hurt so many people and walk away without any punishment. It feels like to me if I ever do anything wrong to someone, something comes back to bite me in the ass. Karma sucks, but I wonder if it's all coincidental? I also wonder if I just have horrible luck.

I don't wanna change things, but I'm being forced. I don't want to move, but change is exciting. I think change is leading me to St. Louis, but the thing is, moving to North Carolina I would have so much more freedom, but I don't know a single soul. It sucks being the new kid, being so awkward and being stared at, getting asked the same questions over and over again. It makes me cringe just thinking about it. Plus, seeing others so comfortable in their every day life, while I'm miserable in my own makes me want to puke on their pretty brand new shoes.