it was a good few months

"you laugh at every word tryin hard to be cute,
i almost feel sorry for what i'm about to do"

that really reminds me of someone.

it's weird thinking about where i was this time last year, and where i am today. every friend i made and lost throughout that year. this time last year i was sitting in rehab. it's so fucking crazy it has been that long since all that bullshit happened.

i was staring at my profile picture on myspace, and it just made all these memories rush to me, it feels so...surreal. to think here i am, i've gone this far. i miss that picture, well i mean not the actual picture, but what it represents. being with my best friends over at paul's house every day. i miss it all so much, i used to have so much fun all the time. so much fun i can't even remember half of it. but i just miss it all so much. it's like the people i left behind are the people that i laugh the hardest with and that i can actually be myself around without worrying what their opinion of me is, because i already know their opinions, you know? i just miss the feeling of knowing that i'm surrounded by people who would do anything for me. it's crazy sitting in a room full of people that you know nothing about, it's a scary feeling. so much to learn and so much to experience....all over again.